I know it's too late but for the record this is the correct version.

The king sighed and began to speak, "I used to be a happy child. Laughing, chuckling, chortling, guffawing, giggling, snickering, these I did with much regularity. I would horse around like... well like a horse. But now in my old age I find that life has lost it's amusing quality. Indeed I fear that unless I find something new to inspire those hilarious chuckle-snorts of old I may never laugh again."

Do you get eliminated if your contribution does not meet the requirements?
I just thought you had to try again...
Well, let's hear what Kal says. It's his game after all.

Raiserb1ade does have to miss a turn, so the above b BoyBlunder is the last accepted story. It's Charlesx' turn and he must build on the story starting from this point.

So Raiserb1ade still has both his items to use up, putting him one turn behind everyone else. I actually didn't mind him reposting his entry, but the way he used "horse" was a bit too much of a stretch. Remember to fit your items in as actual items, characters, events or places--don't sneak them in as part of a phrase.

I was a bit curious how you'd feel about the use of 'horse' as a verb as I expected the items to be nouns - but then I realized he used 'horse' as a noun later on.
Good to know what happens if you screw up though.

I don't suppose someone could collect all the snippets in one post and upate accordingly?

Good idea.


Chapter 1:
Once upon a time, long, long ago in a far away land, across the ocean, over the hills and valleys, one days journey across the desert, underneath upper, middle, and lower earth, and two left turns to the right of Transylvania, there lived a King by the name of Theodore Reywashkadoom the Third. “King Teddy”, as he was known to his family and friends, lived an average castle in the middle of an average kingdom on the top of an average age-old Mountain. But for how average the King’s life was, he was not a happy man.

“King Teddy is not happy!” He would often say, as like all Kings, Teddy liked to hear his name said and thus would always speak in the third person in order to hear it more often.

Chapter 2:
"And when the King is not happy, his subjects cannot be happy either!" exclaimed King Teddy. "From this day forth, laughter and merriment shall be against the law, and those found breaking the law will be imprisoned in the Cave of Despair, for faithlessness against their rightful sovereign!"
Heralds were immediately sent out to make the proclamation, and from that day forth the kingdom was a place without laughs and merriment.

Chapter 3:
The Cave of Despair was slowly turning into the jolliest place in the Kingdom, as Jesters, Clowns and Comedians were the first imprisoned, they had Joke-offs every night, and despite the ooze that seeped from the walls and general gloom and the regular beatings handed out by the guards, nothing could stop them as their audiences grew from the commoners and foreigners that kept being arrested and imprisoned there.
Nobody knew who or what the Guards were, most people guessed they were enchanted armour, they marched out of the high windowed Palace barracks, they stood completely still on duty but could move like lightning, and their voices had a slightly mechanical sound. No one noticed during one of the more brutal beatings handed out by the Palace Guard, one of the Guard picked up a bundle of notes dropped by one of the Comedians.
Word of the Joke-offs leaked back to the castle but the newly appointed First Minister (replacing the older, unluckily named Frederick Unwin Neville the Younger, who had an unfortunate habit of spontaneously laughing at inopportune moments), refused to let the news get to the King. He desperately wanted to know what was making the King unhappy, but was too afraid to ask.

Chapter 4:
The new First Minister decided to send someone to ask King Teddy what was wrong. He sent Mark The Minimalist. Mark the Minimalist was an orphan. He would not be missed should the king decide to punish his insolence. Mark the Minimalist asked the king what was wrong.

Hilarious. I screw up on the stated rules but then get penalized for an unwritten one. It all works out I guess.

I'd like to join the game, if players are still being accepted (and since it looks like you're not at the 10 person cap and its still turn 1, I've got a shot!)

Here is my piece:

"What is wrong?!??" retorted the unhappy monarch when the question was posed to him in a hushed and fearful tone. "King Teddy is not happy because of what it says in the manuscript of Kharambolas. Surely, Mark the Minimalist, you must have heard of the prophecy that that dastardly old man spoke unto the realm. King Teddy's average life will end when he hears a joke that will make him laugh until his heart explodes. If you would lift the grim threat of Kharambolas' prophecy from this land, Mark the Minimalist, go forth and find a way to ensure that it does not come to pass."

If you're still accepting new players Kal, then I'd very much like to join in as well!

Charlesx' entry is accepted. It's now Grinner's turn.


DarkCorsair & Melkhor--you may both join in the game. I'll post your items and PM you an ending later today or tomorrow.


Chapter 1:
Once upon a time, long, long ago in a far away land, across the ocean, over the hills and valleys, one days journey across the desert, underneath upper, middle, and lower earth, and two left turns to the right of Transylvania, there lived a King by the name of Theodore Reywashkadoom the Third. “King Teddy”, as he was known to his family and friends, lived an average castle in the middle of an average kingdom on the top of an average age-old Mountain. But for how average the King’s life was, he was not a happy man.

“King Teddy is not happy!” He would often say, as like all Kings, Teddy liked to hear his name said and thus would always speak in the third person in order to hear it more often.

Chapter 2:
"And when the King is not happy, his subjects cannot be happy either!" exclaimed King Teddy. "From this day forth, laughter and merriment shall be against the law, and those found breaking the law will be imprisoned in the Cave of Despair, for faithlessness against their rightful sovereign!"
Heralds were immediately sent out to make the proclamation, and from that day forth the kingdom was a place without laughs and merriment.

Chapter 3:
The Cave of Despair was slowly turning into the jolliest place in the Kingdom, as Jesters, Clowns and Comedians were the first imprisoned, they had Joke-offs every night, and despite the ooze that seeped from the walls and general gloom and the regular beatings handed out by the guards, nothing could stop them as their audiences grew from the commoners and foreigners that kept being arrested and imprisoned there.
Nobody knew who or what the Guards were, most people guessed they were enchanted armour, they marched out of the high windowed Palace barracks, they stood completely still on duty but could move like lightning, and their voices had a slightly mechanical sound. No one noticed during one of the more brutal beatings handed out by the Palace Guard, one of the Guard picked up a bundle of notes dropped by one of the Comedians.
Word of the Joke-offs leaked back to the castle but the newly appointed First Minister (replacing the older, unluckily named Frederick Unwin Neville the Younger, who had an unfortunate habit of spontaneously laughing at inopportune moments), refused to let the news get to the King. He desperately wanted to know what was making the King unhappy, but was too afraid to ask.

Chapter 4:
The new First Minister decided to send someone to ask King Teddy what was wrong. He sent Mark The Minimalist. Mark the Minimalist was an orphan. He would not be missed should the king decide to punish his insolence. Mark the Minimalist asked the king what was wrong.

Chapter 5:
"What is wrong?!??" retorted the unhappy monarch when the question was posed to him in a hushed and fearful tone. "King Teddy is not happy because of what it says in the manuscript of Kharambolas. Surely, Mark the Minimalist, you must have heard of the prophecy that that dastardly old man spoke unto the realm. King Teddy's average life will end when he hears a joke that will make him laugh until his heart explodes. If you would lift the grim threat of Kharambolas' prophecy from this land, Mark the Minimalist, go forth and find a way to ensure that it does not come to pass."

Here's the items for the two new players:

8. DarkCorsair: Poison, Mirror

9. Melkhor: Gravestone, Mouse

I'll PM you both your endings promptly.


In the meantime, it's still Grinner's turn.

Mark the Minimalist was sorely confused, for he had never heard of any such prophecy, so he decided to go back to the First Minister for advice. On his way to the Minister’s chambers, he met Queen Charlotte and her twin daughters Elsbeth and Marcella. “Well met, your majesty,” said Mark the Minimalist, “and perhaps you can help me, for I have just been speaking with your husband, the king, and I know not the prophecy of which he speaks.” “What misery it has brought upon our family, what pain and sorrow when little girls are not allowed to laugh and giggle with joy,” replied the Queen. “I know I be but an ignorant orphan, but I would like to help if I may,” said Mark the Minimalist.

(Card used: People Meet)

Grinner's entry is accepted. It's now DarkCorsair's turn.

Chapter 1:
Once upon a time, long, long ago in a far away land, across the ocean, over the hills and valleys, one days journey across the desert, underneath upper, middle, and lower earth, and two left turns to the right of Transylvania, there lived a King by the name of Theodore Reywashkadoom the Third. “King Teddy”, as he was known to his family and friends, lived an average castle in the middle of an average kingdom on the top of an average age-old Mountain. But for how average the King’s life was, he was not a happy man.

“King Teddy is not happy!” He would often say, as like all Kings, Teddy liked to hear his name said and thus would always speak in the third person in order to hear it more often.

Chapter 2:
"And when the King is not happy, his subjects cannot be happy either!" exclaimed King Teddy. "From this day forth, laughter and merriment shall be against the law, and those found breaking the law will be imprisoned in the Cave of Despair, for faithlessness against their rightful sovereign!"
Heralds were immediately sent out to make the proclamation, and from that day forth the kingdom was a place without laughs and merriment.

Chapter 3:
The Cave of Despair was slowly turning into the jolliest place in the Kingdom, as Jesters, Clowns and Comedians were the first imprisoned, they had Joke-offs every night, and despite the ooze that seeped from the walls and general gloom and the regular beatings handed out by the guards, nothing could stop them as their audiences grew from the commoners and foreigners that kept being arrested and imprisoned there.
Nobody knew who or what the Guards were, most people guessed they were enchanted armour, they marched out of the high windowed Palace barracks, they stood completely still on duty but could move like lightning, and their voices had a slightly mechanical sound. No one noticed during one of the more brutal beatings handed out by the Palace Guard, one of the Guard picked up a bundle of notes dropped by one of the Comedians.
Word of the Joke-offs leaked back to the castle but the newly appointed First Minister (replacing the older, unluckily named Frederick Unwin Neville the Younger, who had an unfortunate habit of spontaneously laughing at inopportune moments), refused to let the news get to the King. He desperately wanted to know what was making the King unhappy, but was too afraid to ask.

Chapter 4:
The new First Minister decided to send someone to ask King Teddy what was wrong. He sent Mark The Minimalist. Mark the Minimalist was an orphan. He would not be missed should the king decide to punish his insolence. Mark the Minimalist asked the king what was wrong.

Chapter 5:
"What is wrong?!??" retorted the unhappy monarch when the question was posed to him in a hushed and fearful tone. "King Teddy is not happy because of what it says in the manuscript of Kharambolas. Surely, Mark the Minimalist, you must have heard of the prophecy that that dastardly old man spoke unto the realm. King Teddy's average life will end when he hears a joke that will make him laugh until his heart explodes. If you would lift the grim threat of Kharambolas' prophecy from this land, Mark the Minimalist, go forth and find a way to ensure that it does not come to pass."

Chapter 6:
Mark the Minimalist was sorely confused, for he had never heard of any such prophecy, so he decided to go back to the First Minister for advice. On his way to the Minister’s chambers, he met Queen Charlotte and her twin daughters Elsbeth and Marcella. “Well met, your majesty,” said Mark the Minimalist, “and perhaps you can help me, for I have just been speaking with your husband, the king, and I know not the prophecy of which he speaks.” “What misery it has brought upon our family, what pain and sorrow when little girls are not allowed to laugh and giggle with joy,” replied the Queen. “I know I be but an ignorant orphan, but I would like to help if I may,” said Mark the Minimalist.

is there still room for one more please?