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At 12:42 ET. I can honest tell July 2017 to go f'itself. This has been a brutal month.
To make a long story short, my core family consists of six boys and one girl. These are me and my two brothers, and my four cousins (three boys and a girl). These are the four children of my mother's sister. Those four are the oldest, then my two brothers, then me. At various points in our lives we have all lived together when the calamity struck the families. The age spread between the oldest boy, George, and me (the youngest) is 22 years. Between me and my next oldest brother is a 12 year gap. So I am basically the baby of the family.
As of last week, those three oldest boys: George, Bobby, and Chris have now all passed. Chris died a few years ago.We lost George in February. It was unexpected. He died of a heart attack while driving home from work on a Friday evening. His children are in there 30s and I am close with them. So I was involved in dealing with some of the family matters.
My cousin Bobby passed late last Saturday and his funeral was this Saturday past. He was one of the people I most loved on this planet. 18 years older than me, he was like a big brother. His daughter, Jen, is three years younger than me and she is like my kid sister. We in fact have the closest bond between the two extended families as she lived with me when we were little. So her dad, Bobby, is biologically my cousin, like a brother to me in some ways and like a father as well as Jen's father.
He went in for a routine stress test late June. Was never released and they performed an emergency bypass surgery that due to him having Charcot-Marie-Tooth Disease, ended up with him getting worse and worse throughout July.
I talked with Jen daily during his hospital stay. But his condition slipped quickly and I got a frantic text from Jen between Round 1 & Round 2 of our Saturday game on June 22nd. Bobby was slipping and decisions had to be made. He died peacefully that night.
This Saturday was the funeral that I had to speak at. We had a Friday night game and thankfully one of my players knew how broken I was, and he was able to keep things moving and clear the room quickly so I could get home to practice my part.
Throughout this month, my mother who has Parkinson's, took the news of losing her nephew Bobby terribly. We lost George in February and Bobby, who was the nicest of us, was too much to bear. So all this week while running games, working, managing a hellish commute, I had to deal with my mom's degenerating condition. There were six boys. Three were her sister's and three were hers. All three of her sisters boys have now passed (two within 5 months) and my mom now feels her three boys are all next.
With George and Bobby's death, I have become the most responsible male of my family and they need me to sort out the finances and insurance. I literally have broken down hourly for the past week. Driving in the car. Sitting in traffic. Quiet moments on the sofa. I hide my grief from my family. Bobby was on Facebook. I still see his posts. I see his photos. Facebook tells me he liked certain pages. I am not yet equipped to handle grieving in the age of social media.
So #### July. It tried to take everything from us. #### July and its miserable 744 hours.
TL;DR That sucks, my condolences.
And I need to see this green, I need to stain my deck.
Speaking of my wife, I'm quite sure she wants me to paint it black. A couple times lately I've overheard her having a conversation with someone and she talks fondly of their "big, black deck" and how she can't wait to see it again.