Wish grant, unfortinatly the palistinains choose that time to start a new wave of voilence. This wave of voilence wipes out every isrealy military personel in the west bank and half the civilains.

I wish we could find a PEACEFUL solution to that situation.

Granted.

Bush beats you for cancelling his favorite show.

I wish I had golden pants.

Granted they cafe, the cafe really, really badly.

I wish cheney dies of a heart atack, codiliza rice becomes vice president, and then bush dies and Ms. Rice becomes president. (Apoligies to anyone who is so out of touch with world events to not know who Condiliza Rice is.)

Wish granted

A horrible disease sweeps the region. It is 100% fatal and is transmitted when the current victim looks at the someone.

(BTW, the Palestinians would not be able to wipe out Israel. The Arab alliance army had a 12 to 1 manpower advantage, along with air, armour and artillery superiority in 1948 and still lost. In the Yom Kippur War Egypt had absolute strategic surprise and the war still ended with Israeli armour on the way to Cairo. Arab victory over Israel? Ain't gonna happen)

I wish I knew everything about everything. And that my head did not explode from this. Or that this attracted the ubiquitous Mr/Mrs. Whiskers. Or any monkeys OR apes. Or guys named Bubba, whether or not they are a pirate and/or a ninja. And that it would not cause any other body parts to shrivel up in compensation. Or cause to grow freakishly larger either. Also no elephants or zombie turkeys. And since I am at it, no non-sequitorial car accidents

And to anyone who is bothered by grotesque misspelling of her name!

Ya and any other spelling or gramitical errors i make.

Grannted

Your so smart you isolate yourself from everyone and everything for U believe we are all inferrior (Spelt right?) lifeforms. You use your knowlage to wipe all living forms from the Universe and die from isolation.

I wish for automatic spell check (for I am to lazy to press a button)

Wish granted

However due to your poor spelling, it is understood to be that any time you try to cast a spell you automatically get a Czech in the mail

You go broke from feeding hundreds, then thousands, of Eastern Europeans. And, since magic does not work in the real world, you have no way to generate money other than by hard work.

You eventually manage to get another wish, but this only results in your acquisition of an automatic spall chick. You have no idea what it is, but it does have a start button. However, just as you build the courage to press it, you are waylaid by several dozen starving Sudetenlanders who seize the weapon so they can sell it for food.

Still starving, they turn cannibal, with you as the first repast. You end this sad tale as Slavic dung.

I wish the Czechs in this story had a happy ending

Wish granted, but now the Czechs rule the world, thanks to you. & now we're stuck watching nothing but Classic Star Trek episodes, that only focus around Chekov.

I wish I had a pool filled with Pepsi.

Granted.

Special Ed from Crank Yankers swims in it.

I wish I had Kill Bill Volume 1 on DVD.

Wish granted, but you've accidentally bought the wide-screen, Deutch version.

I wish I could pee forever.

Granted.

You wet the bed...and the sofa...and the TV...and our computer...and your girlfriend...and your boss...and everything else...

Not again! :disappoin

I wish to see Michealangelo's David.

Wish granted: And he really likes you, stone member and all.

I wish I were funnier.