We're hoping it gets enough XP to learn to hypnotize people. It'll make conquest so much easier.

This game is going to end with you yahoos standing over the ruined, blackened shell of reality. I just know it.

And you'll probably consider that a victory! You monsters!

(though I'd give it good odds that, while standing over the ruined, blacked shell of reality there'd still be a Goomba chomping on Wade's bottom)

You should hear one of the actions I came up with.

Jantern I'm pretty sure the goomba isn't going to listen to our words at this point.

I'm going to do a double ddt on the hammer bros (body)

Don't listen to him! He's clearly hypnotized!

I'll save that for Bowser, then.

I'm going to rattle off a recipe for a mushroom sauce to the Goomba, to make it fearful of my vast knowledge. (Brain + KNOWLEDGE OF IMPROVISED COOKING LV 1).

6 Brain + Roll of 4 for attack + Roll of 3 for Improvise cooking = 13

You know, I just had a good idea regarding what to do about the Goomba.

I'm the GM, though.

I'm pretty sure it would have worked!

I'm not equipping the Goomba as a codpiece, Jack.

What if I just sit down?

The Goomba is a fungal life form. Thus, its cells have walls made of Beta-Glucose sheets, making them rigid, tough. Clearly sitting upon them will have no effect whatsoever.

Mario kills them when he sits on them...

Assuming Mario is of average-ish, maybe a little below average-ish height, he's dropping on them on average from a height of 25 feet. Since Force=Mass*Acceleration, and Work=Change in Energy=Force*Distance, and assuming that the Mushroom Kingdom has a gravitational acceleration constant comparable to Earth's (although it's hard to tell, given the fact that he's jumping so damn high) at about 9.8 m/sec^2, and given that he's a plump guy, he's hitting them with a lot more force than just plopping down on them. In fact, we're not entirely sure how he's still walking after those jumps, given Newton's Third Law.

And I'm obviously not talking out my ### at all.

At this point, unless someone else is willing to jump on it for you, I think that's probably your best bet.

Unless you try to jump on one of the Hammer Brothers and land with the Goomba between you and whichever Brother you land on top of.

Of course, if the force of Gravity is significantly lower in the Mushroom Kingdom, we should get massive bonuses to the amounts we can lift and the distances we can jump for the time being, Jack. And given that we're from a higher gravity world than they are, we would be like unto gods.

Well I am going to use my sexy body to sit down and watch as Pax does all the work with the Hammer Brothers!