Having Tasha boned by Mister Data wasn't something that you see in Star Trek often, either. Unless your name is James Tiberius Kirk, that is.

Ah, the drunk episode. Not the worst written one in the first season...but probably close.

"I'm going to see if I can't get Data to teach me the Vulcan Nerve Pinch." (Body? Brain?)

Jawa tries to get some info out of chrome dome.

Picard actually doesn’t know that much more than you; a Klingon colony has disappeared in this part of space, and then Enterprise was sent to offer assistance. The Klingons are suspicious as all hell, however.

“The Klingons haven’t allowed us to approach the site where the colony was,” says Picard. “They claim that in its place is a new asteroid field of roughly the mass of the colony. If I didn’t know better, I’d say the entire colony -- world and all -- had been somehow obliterated. However, there’s no such firepower in this part of the galaxy! No native firepower, at any rate.”

Wade starts saying something about a droid, but Boy Blunder goes FREEEEARG! It kinda gets lots in the shuffle.

Boy Blunder’s pocket shimmers and shines! In it is a scrap of paper with F = m x a written on it.

Well, that’s useful.


Pax takes Data aside and asks him if he knows any weapons of mass mutilation. Data tells him that he’s not authorized to violate the prime directive for a spiky alien.


CharlesX tries to warn the Klingon, but he’s too damn proud. “I spit on your Ka’PLAH!” he snarls as he ignores the danger behind him.

JK sidles up to Data and gives him a few commands. Data presses some seemingly random buttons, and then turns to Picard. “Captain, I have verified that there is a foreign presence not native to our universe on board that ship.”

By now the Klingon ship has cut communications. Picard tries to raise them to no avail. Even the Klingon ship’s shields are down!

“We’ll have to send a boarding party,” Picard says.

“I volunteer these guys,” says Riker, grinning at Wade with malice.

“Indeed,” says Picard. You lot are then hustled to the transporter room to investigate the Klingon ship!

After your transportation, you are in the halls of a Klingon warship. It’s cramped there’s lots of red lighting for some reason. Nobody seems to be around. There’s a corridor stretching ahead and behind you, and a hatch marked “Engine Room” in Klingon off to the side. Which you can read somehow. Cough.

You figure the bridge is ahead, with the crew quarters behind.

Everyone gets an XP but CharlesX.

Oh Great. We have a Death Star to deal with. Well, one step at a time. Do we want to investigate the engine room, to see if we can redirect some of the systems to our advantage, or do we want to storm the bridge?

Also, F=ma? How is Newton's Second Law an attribute? Hmm.

Meh, we aren't planets so I'm not terribly worried about a Death Star.

I'll probably boot down the door to the Engine Room, there's always something useful in those things.

As you might remember from Return of the Jedi, Capital Ships don't fair to well against those things either.

Did the Death Star actually fire at the Capital Ships? I thought they just crashed into it's "FULLY FUNCTIONING SHIELD!!!!" of Doom.

Probably because it has something to do with Force. Such as the Force.

While I get they're kind of ticked off about Wade and such and were eager to get rid of him, I still think it was kind of a jerk move on the Enterprise' part to send us over here without comm. badges and phasers.

Anyway, I will use my 10 XP to purchase an attribute from the latest randomized list that popped up when we left the TMNT universe. (AKA This universe/whatever universes are melded together to form our current adventure)

Also, I recommend we split into two teams of three, with one team headed for the bridge and the other headed for the crew quarters. Any thoughts on this?

"That blast came from the Death Star! THAT THING'S OPERATIONAL!" -Lando

Those poor, poor fish people.

Or one group takes engine room, one group takes crew quarters, we clear the place and meet up on the bridge?

I'd suggest going to the Engine Room first. It's the most critical part of any Star Trek ship design and should let us do all kinds of fun tricks and figure out where everyone else is so we don't waste a lot of time. Setting up force fields to contain potential opposition before we meet that potential opposition is a preferred tactic of mine.

Or turning off the gravity. Or opening the windows on a section or two, so to speak. The possibilities are endless.

Shoot, anyone with a semi decent Brain score should be able to take control of the Bridge from the Engine Room. I love how ridiculous Trek can get.

Okay, so you and me in the engine room, anyone else want to come along?

I shall plan to head for the bridge. Maybe I can contact the Enterprise from there and ask Picard what was up with him shipping us over here without any weapons or communicators.

So thus far, we have the Engine party of Pax and JK, and the Bridge party of myself. Considering what JK mentioned, if one person joins me, we can have the last two head for the crew quarters.

How should we split this?